You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
There's even glitter on my cock...
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