Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
