Can Purell be used as lube?
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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