Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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