just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
