Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Randomize
