Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Randomize
