yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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