butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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