chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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