1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
