Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
