Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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