What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
