Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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