he wants to bone in the snuggie
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize
