The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
