Having a random hookup so left but love u
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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