Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
