Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
