I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
