apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Randomize
