I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
babies were throwing up all over the place
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
