you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
