Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
