He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
