I puked a lego.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
