Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
