I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
