just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
