in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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