Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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