At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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