Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
