What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
