if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
