Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Randomize