the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
