i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I have feelings that need drinking.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
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