Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
