For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
