There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
