Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
