she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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