You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
