How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
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