Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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