I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
