the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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