Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
